I'm drinking coffee.

I titled this post "I'm drinking coffee" because I am and that is wierd. I think it marks some sort of quarter life crisis for me. Like I feel the need to be addicted to something that claims the power to "keep me going". Food is no longer enough, sleep won't cut it, I need something more, something powerful, something expensive! Ok, the coffee was free (thanks Jan), but still, I find myself liking it. Anyways, I find myself stressed lately. And probably some for the obvious reasons, but also a lot for wierd reasons. I find myself being pulled in a lot of different directions and I want them all.

Just this week I started thinking about possibly getting an MBA. Just me typing that sentence is odd. I feel like there is somebody somewhere who just won a million dollars because he made a $1 bet when I was 12 that I would never even entertain the idea. And oddly enough, the idea is really growing on me. It makes sense. A lot of sense. And I can't figure out why. Yet, I love painting and writing music and I feel even now that I can't keep up with it all. All I need now is 2 cottages, 4 boats and 8 coffee makers by the time my mid life crisis hits to make it all official. Some people can handle it all, I can barely keep my lawn mower going. I will have to hire somebody just to buy coffee for me full time.

In reality, I probably just need to be better with my time, keep an organized schedule and start "planning" my time better. But although this post probably comes off as complaining, that is not the intent. I am actually super excited. I have a beautiful wife, a great job, an amazing church, and tons of people that I am around constantly. I find it interesting that Jesus started his ministry in his 30's. Not that being thirty meant the exact same then as it does for us now, but I imagine there are a lot of similarities. I can feel the temptation starting to creep in of wanting to "build" something. That is the time Jesus chose to start a public ministry challenging everybody to destruct their little kingdoms and give up everything for the gospel. Christ's words are continually taking on new meaning and His ministry at age 30 has never made more sense to me.